Great News!  The interview I did with Alan Colmes – Healed Planet is available!

The topic…

Letting Go, of course 🙂

Enjoy!

Read Letting Go Challenges Part 1 here.

Read Letting Go Challenges Part 2 here.

A Letting Go Practice yields results. All you need is a willingness to let go. Then, learn the simple letting go method and voila! You’re on your way to releasing pent up negativity, disease and chronic pain.

People willing to let go can look forward to life-giving benefits.

Here are a few:

Benefits to Letting Go

• reduction and elimination of stress
• improved relationships
• increased happiness
• clarity of Self, purpose (revealing answers to the Big Questions in Life)
• improved physical well being and healing
• live in and embrace the present moment
• handle change
• offer compassion, forgiveness, love and understanding towards others and self
• reveal inner wisdom and guidance
• achieving a sense of “benign indifference” to old hurts, traumas, and suffering

Yes, letting go works. Until you forget about it.

I’m not kidding. It’s my toughest letting go challenge. I seldom struggle to quiet my mind (challenge #1). I aptly listen to my body (challenge #2). My grande problema is going unconscious and forgetting that I could let go.

Let’s paint a picture. I’ll use myself as the subject because I know how people love blogs written in the 3rd person 🙂 (Haha! It’s letting go time!)

How Easily We Forget

Doree receives some disturbing news. She becomes emotionally distraught. Forgetting to let go, she makes a mindless choice between two doorways. Behind Door 1 we witness a dramatic melt down. Doree could let go, but she’s too busy being a Drama Queen.

Behind Door 2 it’s dark. If Doree pushes through this door, we won’t see her for some time. If we do, it’s too dark for her to see us.This is the door leading to shame, guilt and self-loathing. For Doree it is the darkest place.

In the past, loving friends have knocked on both doors.

“I’m sorry this is happening Doree. You know, you could let it go.”

In the early days of letting go a friend would knock many times. These days a knock gets results as Doree flings open the door and says,

“Oh yah. I can let go! Why didn’t I think of it?! Thanks for reminding me.”

How to Keep the Fire Going in Your Letting Go Practice

Like many people, I feel excitement tapping into self-help. I have a deep inner desire to learn and grow. The ideas ignite inside me. I’m on fire with possibilities! Like a piece of metal, I become flexible with heat. But just like metal, put out the fire and I go back to being rigid.

So how do I keep the fire going in my letting go practice? How do I stay flexible and open? How do I remember I have the choice to let go?

One way is to enlist your loved ones as champions. Share how, in the past, you’d “juice” the negativity.

“You know how that topic would get me on a rant? Well, I’m intending to do something different from now on. I’m going to let it go. And, if you like, you could help me.”

When your loved one sees you struggle, ask them to gently remind you.

“I wonder, dearest… If you might let that go.”

Post-it notes saying, “Let Go” are great reminders. Beginning and ending each day with some letting go time might help too.

Just admitting you tend to go unconscious at stressful times is a huge start.

Before I forget. Thank you for reading and for letting go.

Love!

Doree

We continue our posts relating to common challenges that arise while letting go.

Read Letting Go Challenge #1 here.

Letting Go Challenge # 2  – I can’t feel anything (What sensations?!)

So you hear about this simple yet effective method to achieve inner freedom. It’s free and available round the clock. Even when you can’t sleep. You’re impressed with the possibilities. “That’s worth a try!” you declare.

Only at your first, second and perhaps 10th attempt, there appears to be a problem.

You can’t feel your body. No sensations. Nada. What’s more, there’s this thought tape saying over and over, “I can’t feel anything. What sensations?! I don’t notice anything. What’s she talking about? I don’t get the breathing part!”

“How can I let go of something I can’t feel?!”

The ego-mind is sneaky. When it senses you’re heading for freedom (from pain), ego swings into action. Programs and beliefs against letting go are loaded. Of course you can’t feel. You’ve been stunned by limiting beliefs!

Something else. As you know, having a quiet mind is essential to letting go.

But thinking about not feeling has got you thinking.

Ahhh!  (see what I mean by sneaky?)

Ego – 2   Self – 0

Don’t get discouraged. You’ve got this. Let’s cancel all the mental silliness and get back to noticing what’s going on from a quiet mind. Remember, each time you sense a comment emerging from the peanut gallery, “Shush it!” Shhh!

Key Point: Do not allow the negative thought to form.

Oh and if you can sense a thought forming then you CAN feel something. Gotcha!

The, “can’t feel the body” stuff is just resistance (thanks ego). It will pass and you will feel plenty.

Your intention is:

…to let go what stands in the way of my inner freedom and happiness

Stick to this (or some version of it that fits for you). Don’t give up. It’s the intention that drives the entire process.

Just keep intending to Let Go.

How does that feel?

Coming up! Letting Go Challenge #3 – Forgetting I Could Let Go

Letting Go is a simple method.

Notice what’s going on in your body.

Then quiet your mind.

And breathe…(into the body’s sensations letting go any resistance).

~ Allow and Surrender to what is. ~

The practice is simple. It’s not easy. Challenges arise often right from the start. This next series of posts will address common and confounding challenges to letting go.

Common CHALLENGES to Letting Go

Challenge #1 – I can’t quiet my mind!

If this is your lament, you’re in abundant company! I get many letters requesting input on some version of quieting the busy mind. So what’s it all about? This thing we call, “my mind?”

Let’s lift the curtain and have a look.

Our minds are run by a human system (more on this) acting against inner peace and quiet. Many people live entire lifetimes filled with non-stop mind chatter. The only relief comes with sleep, being unconscious or sedated by drugs or TV. It rarely occurs to us that we could have some quiet-time upstairs.

A noisy mind is a wall to personal growth while a quiet mind is a keystone.

~ Doree Blake

We exist in a world addicted to negative thinking. Our minds are rumpus rooms of random thoughts, regretful stories, prideful opinions and fear-mongering news.

“I can’t stop this damn ruckus!” you wail. Your real voice goes unheard amidst the cacophony.

The moment you declare your desire to have some peace and quiet, the fun starts. It gets worse. More random thoughts ignite. Analysis and inner debate ensue. All held by the belief, “I am my thoughts.”

Utter nonsense.

Unsolicited thoughts, opinions, musings, criticisms, stories of what happened are never you. Never.

“If you were your thoughts, then you could stop them.”

~ Dr David R Hawkins

Not you, thoughts emerge from an impersonal system called, ego. Hacking into this system can be eye-opening and eventually, liberating. It’s a game changer and worth further study. *Some of my study is featured in this blog.

Ready to Unplug?

The greater your understanding of the human-ego wiring, the closer you are to unplugging it. Why would you want to unplug? Because who you really are (your True and gentle Self) lives underneath. This True Self cannot be harmed or undone. It is the Self pondering, “What would love do?” amidst the nasty chaos. This Self forgives, shows acceptance and kindness. This is the everlasting, loveable YOU. The journey to unplug the ego results in inner freedom and the happiness we seek.

So ask yourself…

Am I worth a quiet mind? 

A Quiet Mind in Three Steps

Step 1.

Take a day or two and observe your ego-mind. Reserve any judgement (it’s not who you are anyways). Just notice the comings and goings of thought. What, who and when are the triggers to thinking? Become aware of the ego-minds favourite topics. What does it love to complain about? How would it say you’ve been wronged? Take a “step back” and have a look.

Step 2.

Assuming you’re willing to embark on this journey to peace and quiet set an intention. Write it down and post it where you’ll see it a couple times a day. Something like this…

I now intend to exist from a quiet mind.

This is a powerful intention. Revisit it often. Use it to interrupt random thinking.

Step 3.

Tap into some tools to soothe the ego-mind. Try them out and select one you might use for at least 30 days. Many to choose from here.

A final word of encouragement. Be gentle with yourself. Let go any judgement of the experience. You are releasing a compulsive way of being that no longer serves your happiness.

Stay tuned for the next Letting Go Challenge – I can’t feel anything (What sensations?!)

This blog is dedicated to the profound work of the late Dr David R Hawkins. My teacher.

If you’re motivated to achieve inner freedom, you’re in luck!

The world is abundant with effective, self-healing options.

Many are free! Self-hypnosis, meditation and Dr Hawkin’s, Letting Go method featured here, are examples.

As a former self-help junkie, I’ve run the gamut. And I want to share the most powerful lesson gleaned from many years and heaps of money invested. Here it is, (and it’s free 🙂

A hallmark of truth is found in it’s simplicity.

Look for simple, low cost, solutions to life’s challenges. The ego loves to complicate everything. And the world of Self-Help and Self-Healing are not immune. If you discover a healing method with more than 3 or 4 steps, keep searching. If you find a “program” with multiple “levels” separated by time and more cash, move on. And, I can’t stress enough, if what’s put to you has secrets (attached to levels), RUN!

It’s likely a cult, masquerading as self-help.

What about similar methods to our Letting Go method? Before you open your wallet too widely, remember, letting go is a natural human process.

Children let go effortlessly.

In learning how to let go, you’re simply re-awakening an innate ability.

So what about, The Sedona Method, The Release Technique, The Work and others?

Like I said, if it’s simple, reasonably priced, passes the cult test and you feel a fit, wonderful! You have the free will to choose.

For a wee bit more on the Sedona Method, I’ve shared my response to a recent reader letter.

Hi Doree,

I was wondering if the Sedona Method is the same method of letting go that Dr David R Hawkins speaks of in his book. The same method that you yourself talk of.

I have tried to let a feeling come up, let it rest there and then let it go, but it doesn’t feel right. Like I’m doing it wrong or something. I don’t seem to feel as much emotion in the resting there as I feel like I should, and so then it doesn’t feel like I’ve let it go at all.

I’m wondering if there is anywhere in Australia that you know of, or elsewhere that teaches this method in a retreat or as a course, so that at least I could feel like I’m getting it right.

Thank you so much for your inspiration!

C

Hi C,

I’m thrilled to hear from you and to learn I’ve inspired you.

Dr Hawkins apparently worked with Lester Levenson the creator of the Sedona Method back in the late 70’s. I’m quite familiar with The Sedona Method having used it myself. At present, Hale Dowaskin has the license and has produced many courses and products including a series of apps called, Letting Go.

For me, the strength of Dr Hawkin’s method is what it doesn’t include. It is absent of mentalizing in any form. The Sedona Method has you asking yourself questions. I found this aspect kept me in my head. I have a tendency to over-think. I analyze. Heck, I even dramatize! Any excuse to stay in the intellect sees me refining and reshaping the issue. Many people escape into substances, overeating, mindlessly watching TV. I escape into my mind. This awareness makes Dr Hawkin’s, Letting Go method a fit for me.

Now to what you present in the second paragraph of your letter. “I have tried…but it doesn’t feel right…I’m doing it wrong…I should…” These are all judgments you’ve made. Criticisms which won’t occur in a quiet mind.

I cannot overemphasize the value of a quiet mind. This could take time and vigilance on your part but you have nothing to lose. Thoughts, such as the ones you shared, are resistance to letting go.

I would love to say I know of a practitioner in Oz, who teaches, Letting Go. The closest I’ve been is with an online group I lead last year. Participants joined from as far off as Germany and Texas. We met weekly on GoToMeeting for 6 months and practiced together for an hour. And the synergistic healing available in a group is outstanding!. One member would bring up an issue. We’d all go silent and practice letting go. Not surprising, participants reported feeling better (lighter, more relaxed, fresh) even when an issue wasn’t theirs. I loved it! 🙂

I will be completing the Letting Go Practitioner Course very soon. This may be an option for you.

Finally, please know the power of your intention. If it is to, “let go,” no matter what, (and no giving up) you will be successful. Inner freedom is not obtained overnight. Enjoy the journey!

Much love to you,

Doree

What if I told you, the cause of stress is never outside of you.

It’s never another person.

It’s never a diagnosis or an overweight body.

It’s never your credit card bill or the loss of a job.

How do I know this is true?

I know, because of a gift you and I share. The gift of Free Will.

It’s such a big deal to self-healing, that I capitalized it. Free Will. The freedom to choose.

So where does stress live? It lives by choice, inside the mind of the individual. We choose stress. And if we choose it often, our poor bodies also pay the price. Relationships become strained. Self-esteem plummets. Problems linger, unsolved.

Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of human freedoms – to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.

~Viktor E. Frankl

Let’s apply this notion of stress to a recent letter I received.

Dear Doree,

I am almost finished reading the book (Letting Go), however, I am still struggling with the actual mechanism. I have noticed a better overall sense and outlook on things. However, one thing that has been absolutely consuming me is fear of lack. I am completely stuck in fear and desire for money. We have a lot of debt, I lost my job so we are on my husband’s salary alone. I watch the debt pile up and I don’t see an end. I make it a practice to “cast the burden of lack on God” (as in The Game Of Life and How To Play It), however, nothing is changing. I feel that my fear and desire alone is blocking the flow of money. I just want relief of the debt and worry. I don’t know how to let go of these feelings because the problems still exist. Please help.

S.

My Dear S,

As I read your letter, a question arose. “What’s a different way to look at this situation?” As I see it, you have a spouse with a job, access to superb books written by Dr. David R. Hawkins and Florence Scovel Shinn, a history of employment, internet access, expressive writing skills, clear communication, an ability to apply multiple self-healing techniques and an indomitable spirit that won’t give up! You even discovered and submitted a question to a blog, on Letting Go. Thousands of people read this blog, few offer their story. Which tells me, you’re amazing! Just sit with that for a moment, please.

The next thing I’d like to do is, recontextualize the story you tell. Try this on for size…

Dear Doree,

I am almost finished the book on Letting Go. I felt motivated to try the method and to write you. I’ve noticed a better overall sense and outlook on things. In myself, I’ve identified an issue to which I can apply the practice of letting go. Hooray! It’s around the desire for more money and to be out of debt. I’ve written down some details to look back on, a year from now.

While creating a deeper awareness of this issue, I discovered a pattern. It begins when I notice a pesky thought as it starts to form. If the thought does complete, more follow and then a wave of distressing sensations. Before I know it, I’m consumed. The thought has turned into a theme and it’s all I think, speak, notice and even write about! However, I know from reading your page on, How to Quiet Your Mind, there are many ways I can interrupt this pattern. I’ve tried some and chosen the one that fits best for me.

Once I’ve quieted my mind, I place my attention on the sensations in my body. In silence, I go into the sensations as they arise and allow them. I don’t imagine what they might be about. Any sensation, (including ones my mind interprets as pain) are accepted. I understand some sticky sensations can come in waves, for weeks, or even longer. That’s OK. Bring them on!

For the next year, I’m devoted to learning how to quiet my mind and to let go. Learning something new can take time. Yet I know, as I use these healing techniques, it will get easier. I look forward to when I can let go under any circumstance. I am now open to, “accepting what is,” as my new and grateful way of being.

Signed,

S

How does it feel to read a recontextualized version of your story? When you recontextualize (a term used often by Dr. Hawkins) you create a different context. So in this case, instead of being “rag dolled” by life, we address each circumstance as a learning opportunity.

In my re-write, I’ve shared the context of taking 100% responsibility for what’s going on inside. The outside world (including money and debt) can do what it likes. We let go reacting and responding to it. Letting go releases us from our resistance (Remember resistance causes suffering). Instead, we move from, “I’m in debt and have nothing,” to “What can I learn from my situation?” The first statement takes on a victim stance while the second is heroic. From courage, we ask, “What is life teaching me?”

I encourage you to retell your story with you, as the hero. You, as the humble and grateful star of your own life adventure. And consider this. What kind of an adventure is without challenge? Without issues like financial debt or unemployment, how could we learn? I never understand the people who clamour for massive solutions to world problems. When suddenly all our problems are solved, what would be the point of this earthly realm? We are here to learn and grow. We are here to face our “problems,” and apply Free Will.

One great reason for practicing letting go is to free-up energy previously devoted to stress. Creating a new context has a similar effect. With an abundance of available energy, amazing things happen! You may uncover the energy that leads to an exciting new job. Please remember to write and share your letting go success story.

Much Love,

Doree

When we are no longer able to change a situation – we are challenged to change ourselves.

~ Viktor E. Frankl

What do you do when someone suggests you’re a tad needy?

I’ll tell you what I did.

Immediately, I got very quiet. How could I be needy if I wasn’t talking, right? But the quiet was only on the outside. Inside it was as loud as Christmas-time in Hoo-ville! I blasted myself with a lecture on how unattractive it was to be needy. How weak and repulsive.

Way to pick the most draining way possible to be, Doree. I’ll bet you’ll get the whiner award for sure this time. All your elementary teachers were right. You are the poster child for Attention Seeking. You are a bottomless pit. An energy vampire. Way to go.

Meanwhile, your bold friend gives you a little wave. It’s all you need…

The embarrassment shifts to irritation. Suddenly you can’t believe their nerve. Who do they think they are telling you you’re needy?! Considering all you do for them.

Then you say,

Maybe I’m needy, but you’re high maintenance.

Game on.

And what a game. Whole lives can get caught up in ego games like this. For what?

I choose to play a different game. The game of taking 100% responsibility for myself and for how I feel. I play the game of Letting Go.

Others have been playing too and today I’d like to feature one of my reader letters. She submitted her letter on my page, Do You Have A Letting Go Question?

Her topic.

Neediness.

Let’s have a look…

Dear Doree,

I want to learn how to let go of my self-criticism & judgment. In particular, I want to learn letting go of my feeling of neediness. Needing affection, needing approval, needing praise.

I KNOW I’m good. I KNOW I’m worthy of love…. But there are days when I just don’t connect with the FEELING of being okay without being appreciated or validated or adored or wanted or needed by others. And I notice my wanting-ness, and hear my specific requesting-ness, but still feel overwhelmed with neediness and disappointed-ness, and wanting love from someone or somewhere outside myself. In these moments I notice my feeling of neediness and don’t know how to let go in those moments!

C.

Dearest C,

I love this topic! Thank you so much for writing and for bravely sharing. When I connect with your words, here’s what comes up for me.

What’s so terribly wrong with being needy?

And who is asking?

Playing the role of asking, “Why am I so damn needy?!” is our inner critic. Also known as the superego (a kind of nasty, authoritative parent) and often at the root of our suffering. And here’s the kicker. None of our self-criticism, none of our judgment is ever true.

Ever.

So back to what’s wrong with being needy?

Absolutely nothing!

You are human and you have needs.

Marshall Rosenberg created a needs inventory. Have a look. My sense is that underneath your struggle with wants and desires, lies a real need. You’re worthy of having these needs met.

The letting go practice can help you here. In the uncomfortable moments you describe, I encourage you to quiet your mind. To breathe. Allow the sensations and if you can, go deeper. One very effective strategy while letting go distressing sensations is to, ask for more. Dive into the shadow and explore the outer reaches of your neediness. Ask yourself, How needy could I be?

Over time life has a way of processing out what we describe as unwanted neediness. Even without your attention the sensations you call, “neediness” will naturally process out of your consciousness. I encourage you to revisit this exact letter a year from now. You’ll be amazed at how far you’ve come. Some of the struggles you describe will be a faint memory.

Thank you for writing and reminding me of my need for connection.

Love!

Doree

You “should” open the door

Dearest Reader,

I invite you to consider this blog post.

That’s my nice way of asking. And, you’re thinking about it…

Now, what if I said, you should read it? In fact, I’m telling you, this blog should be required reading. It should make you smarter. Or less stupid. I’m not sure which.

Oh hey!  Don’t bail yet!

I don’t like getting should on either.

Same as you.

Clearly, we share the same feelings of irritation when someone swoops into our space with their, Fix a Human toolkit, full of handy advice. Oh, they’re full of it all right.  And soon you’re gonna get hit by their, Should Storm.  This post might help (notice I didn’t say should?). We’ll have a look at what’s going on and share some effective strategies to let go, while being should on.

“We cling to our own point of view, as though everything depended on it. Yet our opinions have no permanence; like autumn and winter, they gradually pass away.”

~ Zhuangzi

What motivates someone to give advice? I know sometimes we ask for it. “Help me please! I don’t know what to do.” Other times we act helpless. Maybe pathetic? Thus attracting rescue-types. Perhaps you are of the rescue persuasion yourself? Hey, I’m not judging your super hero costume. I’ve got one too.

But I was not in a rescuing mood when I began writing this post. I was angry. Yah. Pissed at all the people over the years who’ve should all over me. I remembered the unhealed times I just needed someone to listen. Instead, I got mountains of unsolicited advice. Funny how a little, “You should…” can make you feel like an even bigger loser.

Then it hit me. When we share our wounds it frightens people. Because they have wounds too. In an instant, they have to do something quick or face their own stored up negative emotions. A quick escape (from our own dark closet) is to give someone else a few pithy words of advice. There. Let’s place the focus on you (and your crap) so I don’t have to notice me (and my crap). We become do-gooders. Full of unconscious but socially and politically acceptable solutions.

“Concede to ‘what is’ versus ‘what ought to be’”

~ Dr David R Hawkins

I’ve also noticed when I’m upset about something someone, “did to me,” and I share it with a friend, I create a disruption. The seas were calm. But as I told my tale of woe, storm clouds appeared. Now we’re both treading in rough water instead of just me. This got me thinking.  Do I really need to share my sad/mad story?

Instead…

What if I told my friend,

“I’m in the process of letting something go. It would be lovely if we could just be together. I’m so grateful for your company.”

Check out – Part Two – What to Do, When You Get Should On, By Strangers

FEAR you have…much fear. ~ Yoda

Fear is like hiccups. You want them to stop. They continue. Like hiccups, fear comes from inside. In a panic, we try remedies. Hanging over the sink, while drinking water out of the back of a glass. Punishing ourselves with a nasty dose of table sugar. Meanwhile, our friends, get annoyed. Ten minutes before, you were loved and accepted. Now, you’re a nuisance.

In schools, even well behaved students with hiccups, are sent to the principal’s office.

Elementary school principal:   “What seems to be the problem?”

Me (8 years old):   “Uragh!”

Principal:   “Oh.  I see.”

Hiccups like fear, cloud over our happiness. We feel drained. Our battle is futile. Finally, overwhelmed and exhausted we lie down. “Uragh!” Tremors continue to erupt at regular intervals as we surrender to the state of hiccuppingness. And… they stop.

Surrender is letting go.

Works for fear and hiccups.

FEAR – False Evidence Appearing Real

I have a dear friend who, with the best intentions, often lives in fear. She’s smart and carefully studies current affairs. Her knowledge of natural and man-made disasters is superb. But she’s often consumed and even paralyzed by her fearful thoughts. Hyper-vigilant, she suffers from low energy and physical pain. Even worse, fear has suffocated her joy. And there’s no reasoning with it. Remember the hiccups? “Please. Stop… Uragh!”

So what happens when you tell the fearful friend, “Calm down. There’s nothing to fear. It’s all in your imagination.”?

I’ll tell you what happens. How does a fearful animal stuck in a corner behave? In humans and animals alike, fear can rapidly shift to anger. If you must challenge a fearful individual, brace yourself for a blast.

“Fear is the path to the dark side. Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering.”
– Yoda

For a moment let’s turn our attention away from our fear-laden allies and look at ourselves. How do you deal with fear? What is your special brand?

worrying, concern, warning others, frequent hesitation, avoiding socializing, allergies, lecturing on what could go wrong, planning for disasters, planning for everything, being informed of major problems in the world, making pros and cons lists, seeing things as risky, using the phrase, “Be careful!” or “Drive safe”, obsessively washing your hands, sanitizing shopping carts, warning others frantically, “Don’t come near me I have a cold!” eating a designer diet because most food makes you sick, paying any attention to the latest flu on CNN (that will inflict 6 out of 80 million people) and the granddaddy of them all – watching (for more than 1 minute/day) the Weather Channel!

I hope, if you see yourself at all, in this list, that you’ll smile. You’re delightfully human and about to become more courageous. Here we go!

Let’s together, dabble in a little acceptance.  Which applied to any brand of fear, sounds like:

“Yup. I’m afraid. I’m really scared that something might happen. I feel so worried. I feel lost and hopeless.”

Good. Now dig deeper into what could happen. Imagine the worst and tell yourself, “Now I’m terrified. If this keeps up, someone could die.”

Next, gently turn down the thoughts and place your attention on the sensations in your body. Breathe and notice.

Where do these sensations seem to live? Give them more attention. Remember, it’s perfectly ok to be afraid. But we’re not thinking anymore. We’re just breathing into the sensations in and around our body. Do this as long as it takes to feel lighter, brighter and hopeful. Now for the best part. Smile. Bask in the courage you’ve revealed. It was there all along!

Let Go and Liberate Yourself from Fear!

 And the next time hiccups pay you a visit, welcome them. Throw a Hiccup Party! Invite your friends and neighbours. Bake some chocolate cupcakes! (sugar-less of course). Crank up some spicy music and dance with your fear – I mean hiccups. 🙂

Much love to you. I honour your courage and thank you for reading and for letting go.

~ Doree

As I let go explaining I felt lighter and more myself. I noticed how others were trapped by explaining. It had become a cultural expectation. Yet each time we played this game, we gave away our power. Explaining was draining.

Ever heard the words, “Because I said so, that’s why”?      I did. It was my mother’s parenting style and the best she could do. As a new parent, that phrase was on my hit list. “I’ll never say that to my child,” I’d remark, hopefully.

This mandate crossed into my life in general. My plan was not to leave anyone hanging. I would err on the side of over-communicating. At each juncture, I’d be more than willing to explain myself.

“Allow me to explain…”

When you get into the habit of explaining, everyone comes to expect it. You lose the power to just say, “No”. Oh, I tried. But a demanding stare seemed to trigger me into defensive mode. I would hear myself say, “So that’s my decision…here, let me explain why…”

“I had become the explaining fool.”

Then one day I lucked out. I watched a great interview with Oprah and the spiritual teacher, Byron Katie. They were role-playing Oprah being asked for money by a relative. She wanted Katie to teach her how to say, “No”.

In this case, Oprah played the needy relative, demanding and pleading (like an adolescent) for some of Oprah’s money. Katie took the role of Oprah. What happened next, was magic.

Katie, (as Oprah) listened attentively to the now whining, relative.

“Oh please Oprah. I just need the money. You have it. You have so much. Why can’t you just give me a loan for 40 grand to start my business?”

Katie’s response (as Oprah) sounded like this, “I know. Yes, I do have it (eyes connecting, gentle voice, nodding). I understand you really want it. You really want to start something. (she smiled lovingly) And, no.”

Oprah was flabbergasted. I was too. “And, no”?!

The Revelation of, “No”

Katie’s lesson helped me find the power inside to say, “No”. Minus the drama and angst of explaining. I discovered, “No” was often the most self-loving choice for me. And, there’s nothing to explain when a choice is made from love.

“Never explain a decision that’s right for you…

that it’s right for you, is enough.”

My trajectory of explaining had come to an end.

Free at Last! 

As I practiced listening intensely, I became a better and more empathetic listener. Then, I simply shared what was right for me without explaining. Over time, I learned to do this with increasing love for myself and the other.

“Listen so well and with such an open heart,

that you earn the right to speak.”

And after you do, (earn the right to speak*), please do what’s right for you. No explanation. If this feels hard, practice letting go. This practice will surely release what stands in the way of your best choices. Because here’s the secret, what’s best for you is always related to what’s best for me.

To prove it some of us have to go first. Will you step up and choose what’s in your highest good?

Only you can decide. And after you do, please don’t tell me why.

* To earn the right to speak, means you have listened well and shared your understanding of what the other has said. This can be done by being present while they spoke and paraphrasing what you heard them say. At this point, they’ll likely feel “heard”. Now it’s your turn to speak (you’ve earned it!)

I recently posted this comment on my Facebook page…

When people say, “I’m not religious. I’m spiritual”, what does that mean?

I’ve said it too. Many times.

What did I mean?

I’m not going to say that anymore.

Instead, I’m going to find the place (inside me) beyond this or that. Where religious OR spiritual doesn’t exist.

Then, I’m gonna hang out there for a while.

                                                             ~ Doree

Ironically, my intention (above) is a spiritual one. It’s letting go of duality. Most commonly we see duality arise when we say, “I’m not that, I’m this.”

I’m not fussy (like you), I’ll eat anything.

I’m not sick (like you), I’m healthy.

I’m not reactive (like you), I’m peaceful.

I’m not judgemental (like you), I accept others.

I’m not religious (like you), I’m spiritual.

This form of dualistic thinking says: “You are you and I am me – there is no “us”.   Duality is separation.

Ever notice it’s not what someone is that irks us but what they are not. This is duality at work and the reason you might pay attention is simple.

Duality is the opposite of love.

You and I live in an intolerant world. A world where feeling too much makes others uncomfortable. Children don’t get to cry anymore (That’s enough!). Men never got to. Women cry and they’re being hormonal and irrational (don’t put them in charge). We’ve created a world full of people who are terrified to feel anything. Then when something lovely happens (and it does) we feel flat. Nada. We smile demurely and say, “I’m in control of my emotions everyone – have no fear.”

Have you ever heard the words, “You’re too sensitive”?

Twas the story of my life. Growing up, my family called me, “Spaz!” Seemed I was a tad sensitive and they didn’t like it. Hey, I didn’t like it either. Who wants to feel like a dope for bursting into tears all the time?  

Ugly Cry?

Have you noticed how sensitive children go through an awkward, Ugly Duckling phase?  Take heart. With a little time, polished feelers become intuitive swans. If you’ve been labeled overly sensitive – I’ve got great news. You’re at the threshold of evolutionary advancement. Headed where? Straight for joy, my friend.

Participate joyfully in the sorrows of the world. We cannot cure the world of sorrows, but we can choose to live in joy.

~  Joseph Campbell

Thinkers and Feelers

Thinking too much is a distraction from Joy. Feeling too much can be plain distracting.

Yet people who feel are miles ahead of those who can’t or won’t. When you feel, you’re closer to joy. When you think sans feeling, you might be very smart (Commander Spock) – but smart is certainly not joy. If you don’t believe me try to think yourself into joy right now.

How’d that go for you?

Now try this: Sit in a comfy chair preferably with a high back. Take a deep breath in through your nose. As the air comes in, have it open the back of your throat. It should feel delicious. You can make the sound of the ocean if you like. Continue breathing this way. Think of nothing. Place your hand on your heart as you breathe. Now smile. Taste the feeling of joy.

Feel encouraged to feel? Just in case you’re still on the fence – I’ve got a story on what can happen when we hold in our feelings. When we don’t let go.

Letting Go by Roller Coaster

A few years ago I talked lover-man into going to Disneyland for a few days. No kids, just us. When we got there we played the Disneyland game. See who can spot a piece of garbage (winner gets a kiss). This can go on for hours before you see any action. Later we moseyed over to the California Adventure Park and found the gate to the roller coaster. The California Screamer. I do love speedy rides but we don’t have any on the Island. The beginning countdown and roar through the water was exhilarating. We did the first and biggest climb. Rat-ta-ta-ta. Here we go!

What happened next was completely out of my control. I want you to really get that. I was, of course, rolling along the track, screaming like the others (maybe a tad louder than most) and laughing.  I was screaming and laughing for over 20 seconds. Then, my body suddenly took over. The release of screaming and laughing intensified beyond what I could contain. I had lost control. I was appearing hysterical to myself and I could do nothing about it.  The tears flowed as I scream-laughed with maniacal abandon.

When the ride ended I had no composure. Lover-man looked at me and with bemused silence, stepped out of the car. He held out his hand. I may as well have peed my pants. The emotional release was so intense, my legs were weak and wobbly. We walked in silence toward the exit where they post photos captured at an especially delicate part of the ride. I didn’t recognize myself. The woman sitting next to lover-man appeared completely insane. “That freak doesn’t have a Hopper pass – she has a “day pass,” I thought.

Then we walked directly to the one place guests can go to recover from the Screamer – The California Estate Wines. I downed 2 small but potent, plastic glasses of some California red. We sat in the hot sun and people watched. Then through an exit to the Disney Grand Lodge where I plunked myself in an extra-large chair. While staring up at the mezzanine watching lover-man touring around, I fell asleep. He only returned when a couple security guards were spotted, closing in. Still asleep and half slid out of the chair – I’d assumed the recovery position of intense letting go by roller coaster. “She’s with me,” he told the guards and they stepped back – but just a little.

Overly sensitive folks like you and me are not freaks. We’re pioneers on the pathway to joy. We are courageously letting go. So what if our path includes a few roller coasters along the way?

Here’s to laughing and screaming and letting go.

Joy is a net of love by which you can catch souls

~ Mother Teresa

Need to relax? Avoid this common mistake.

Don’t tell the body to relax. It doesn’t work. This demand actually increases physical tension! (You secretly knew this, didn’t you?)

So how do we relax?

The key is body placement. If you learn how to position your body you’ll begin to relax naturally.

Find a place where your back will be protected. This could be a high back chair or with pillows against a wall. Even moving so your back is shadowed by a wall makes all the difference. Protecting your back gives a signal to the body that it’s safe. This is a primal signal. No self-respecting caveman would put his back to the cave’s entrance.

Make any adjustments for comfort.

Focus now on specific body parts. Notice your shoulders. Breathe gently and just notice if there’s anything going on in your shoulder area. Then move to your jaw and do the same thing (remember, not to tell your body to relax). Breathe and notice any sensations. Let your tongue float in your mouth. Now gently close your eyes.

Breathe into your belly and then into any sensations that arise in and around the body. If, at any point, you feel like smiling, do! A tiny grin is a cue for safety and wellbeing. Imagine the Mona Lisa smile. A tension-free face is always a work of art.

Finally, make two agreements:

1. Permission to Go Within ~ Tell yourself, “I have permission to do some inner work”.
2. Declare your Worthiness ~  Acknowledge, “I am worth the time I’m taking to do this.”

Now you’re prepared to meditate, do some healing work, enjoy a guided imagery or practice letting go.

This learnlettinggo.com blog post was inspired by the work of Dr. Mario Martinez

This will be a short post with (hopefully) a powerful message.

It’s about money. Most of us were taught in some way that money is not cool. We learned to be suspicious of too much money. In our culture, money has many negative connotations.  It’s no surprise it doesn’t stick to us in nice ways. Yet isn’t money a neutral thing like air?  It’s like sex or even a gun (do I have your attention now?).

In it’s purest sense it is what it is until we go attaching our beliefs to it. Money becomes what we use it for and our intention behind the using of it (like sex and guns).  If you’re upset about the sex and guns comment consider this. Sex can be beautiful and create a glorious oneness between two people or it can be used for power, control or to do harm. Likewise, guns can help provide food and to protect or be used for evil. Back to money.

Bart, with ten thousand dollars we’d be millionaires. We could buy all kinds of useful things like… love!  ~ The Simpsons

So just for fun consider joining me in letting go the negative programming we carry (in our bodies, hearts, and minds) around money.

Notice I didn’t ask you to fall in love with it.  Just get it to neutral* and see what happens.

No man can tell whether he is rich or poor by turning to his ledger. It is the heart that makes a man rich. He is rich according to what he is, not according to what he has.

~ Henry Ward Beecher

Exercise: Wealth

Take a deep breath and allow it to fill your tummy. Drop your shoulders and let your tongue drop in your mouth. Belly breathe in and out. While you do this quiet your thoughts.  Now let’s enjoy a deep sense of safety and well-being.  Breathe into any sensations that arise in your body and around your body. Once you are in that cozy, gentle place introduce the word wealth. As you breathe in softly think it and stretch it out with your breath.  Then breath out the word in the same manner taking all the time you need for a long, delicious exhale. Chant the word wealth and weave it into your in and out breaths.  Do this at least 10 times or more if you like. Allow the corners of your mouth to break into a Mona Lisa smile.

In this gorgeous state of letting go your body will naturally heal. Your loveable body will also repair negative beliefs connected to money. It seems too simple to work but it does. A part of you might resist it and that is fine. Feel the resistance. Breathe into where it turns up in your body and do the exercise right after this.

After the above exercise is complete, identify what “wealth” means to you. Make a list of what comes to mind. You may discover it is a beautiful word to grow into.

*neutral in this case means a benign indifference

I’ve got news you won’t hear on CNN.

It’s not your genes that define you so much as your tribe.  According to Dr Mario Martinez, less than 5% (Dr Bruce Lipton states less than 2%) of your body’s response to life (how you age, heal or even if you get sick or not) is defined by your genes!

This is a powerful indicator that you’re being defined by, you guessed it, the tribe.  The tribe is your culture which includes your family, friends, what you watch on television, experience at work and in the hospital.  Even those at the grocery store are defining who and what you are. Of course the tribe’s power is evolutionary. For millennia, it’s been safer to stick with the group. When the food is tough to get and predators abound there’s safety in numbers. Now, sticking with the wrong group can put you peril; the beliefs of the group can make us scared and sick.

A few common observations of the mainstream North American tribe:

• don’t age gracefully – getting old sucks  (take a poll to find out)
• speak more about illness than health (listen to what people talk about)
• instead of take a walk  – take a pill (have a look in your medicine cabinet and why don’t we call it a wellness cabinet?!)
• our medical system is predatory
• don’t listen to your body
• don’t know yourself
• discourage joy (it’s not safe to be too happy)

Yikes!  Are you ready to split? I can’t blame you. It’s not exactly a party till the end.

What’s next?

So there’s good news and a wee bit of bad.  First the good. You can leave the scared tribe and become free of their negative beliefs (many of which aren’t even true) AND you’ll take the best of the tribe with you naturally, when you go. Yay! But. Once you’re out my friend, there’s no turning back. So aside from,  “if you stay, you’ll pay” as motivation to leave, what are some benefits to leaving the tribe and what really happens next when you do?

Benefits to leaving the tribe:

• you get to age gracefully if that’s what you choose
• you get to celebrate your health with a happy and active lifestyle
• you can throw away all the pills and items from the world of health terrorism
• you get to breathe deeply and know who you are
• you get to be healthy and wealthy (if that’s your wish)
• you can be worthy of love
• it’s ok to let go
• and the best part of leaving mainstream culture is…you get to be joyfilled!

How do you know you’re stuck in mainstream culture? If you felt ANY resistance to the last list. Like if you wanted to accuse me of being Pollyanna. I’ll give it to you straight. Pollyanna would have burst into flames a thousand times over going through the shit I did to get here. I’m positive because I feel worthy of being happy and loved. I feel this way because I let go as a practice.

People have a hard time letting go of their suffering. Out of a fear of the unknown, they prefer suffering that is familiar.
~ Thich Nhat Hanh

So let’s say you begin the process of leaving your tribe. Maybe you’re well into it. What does this look like?

I won’t sugar coat it. For me, leaving the tribe brought up a heap of resistance. It took a few years to find and learn how to let go.

Hey, before you bail to go for dinner with those friends that only lightly suck your will to live, but you’ve known them forever, know this.  It’s worth it!  It’s so worth it! What you’re essentially doing is creating your own subculture with the best of your old culture and adding the new.

Your process of letting go helps you to shed what you don’t want from the old tribe and to reveal what needs to be included in your new one. Then you don’t go hunting for others to join you as much as you become more and more of who you are. So much more that your peeps will find you.

Blogging is a perfect example of sharing your subculture so that others may connect. This is a great reason for blogging. So if what I share in this blog makes your heart skip a beat, then you’re instantly part of my wee subculture. Incidentally, I was raised by Canadians with Scottish and Ukrainian roots. I like and use the word “wee”, was a keen Highland dancer for many years and can make a mean pierogi.

I’m ok with this post not being on CNN. I’m ok with being small and smiley. I’m ok with letting go that which no longer serves my Highest Good.

This is a really exciting time for me. I’m in Los Angeles attending a workshop with the very talented and cutting edge scientist, Dr Mario Martinez.  He’s an expert on wellness and healing having put together fascinating and important theories derived from an integrated view of the fields of psychoneuroimmunology, cultural anthropology and Buddhist contemplative psychology practices.  He calls this biocognitive science. I’m delighted to be learning how to apply his theories to real life trauma held in the body.  Allow me to share some of what I’ve learned. Of course, I invite you to see if there’s a fit for you and your healing practice.

Have you ever said you forgave someone but then felt somewhere in your body that this wasn’t true?  In other words, this person still triggered something unpleasant inside your body.  This may be experienced as an ache in your stomach or a dullness in your legs.  (My little body willingly carried years of abuse in her cells until I figured out how to let this go.) According to Dr Martinez, healing with the mind (intellect) is ineffective because it does not include the necessary healing of the wounds held in the body.  As I’ve said many times in this blog, our bodies carry the unhealed trauma of our entire lives (and past lives too if you believe in this).  We also, as children, innocently assumed unhealed traumas from our parents.  Our bodies carry cultural traumas and even traumatic events we watch on television. Over time and depending on the type of inner wound, these can develop into dis-eases like cancer, arthritis, diabetes and even fibromyalgia (which Dr Martinez assured us was a very real disease).

Another important point coming out of Dr Martinez’s theories was that our genes have very little impact (less than 5%).  It’s the culture we live in that defines for us how we get sick, how we age and how we heal. Adding to the mental forgiveness that didn’t stick because the body wasn’t considered, now we have to account also for how our culture tells us to deal with the trauma. If the culture says, “Nope. What happened is unforgivable,” even if you want to forgive, you will find it very difficult if not impossible. This is why so many people who’ve imagined they healed through mental therapy still get sick!

The letting go process taught in this site is very effective for healing because it focuses on healing within the body.  What I love about the work of Dr Martinez is that he encourages us to create awareness beyond our bodies and into our culture. Without this awareness, even with letting go we may be stuck in an unhealthy loop that continues to feed our bodies with trauma.

Over the next while, I’ll weave into this blog, many cultural injunctions (none of which are true for ALL humans) from which you can build awareness. Check your body with them and practice letting go.  You might also pay attention to how people around you talk about illness and aging.  See if you hear things like:

It’s that season again. Time for my flu shot!

Oh don’t go outside without a coat, you’ll catch a cold!

Allergies run in our family.

Achey joints are a natural part of aging.

I put my dog on special food for her allergies. (everyone forgets less than 25 years ago most family pets ate table scraps)

Cancer runs in my family so I have to be hyper-vigilant with my lifestyle. It’s not fun but I have no choice.

Everyone knows as you get older memory loss is inevitable.

Doctors say if we live long enough we’ll eventually die of cancer.

Can you think of any others?

hugs from beyond time and space,

Doree

Tip:

Another benefit of a daily letting go practice is the increase in body awareness that develops.

How could we as parents help our children to come into their own individuality and complete their childhood with well developed self-esteem, courage and self-love?

I have some ideas.

Teach your child to let go.

I know this won’t come as a surprise and yet it has never been more important. The more negativity your child clears from within, the greater inner strength revealed.  Instead of complaining with your child about how lame school is (and we’ve all done this) let go together and accept it is what it is. Help the child to see that the world is scared right now and angry about problems like climate change, over population and over consumption not to mention bullying. Everyone is in a frenzy to be right which hasn’t solved much. Nothing is ever solved by people stuck in negative emotions.

When we let go we free up energy and inner resources to look at problems creatively and intuitively. People who have let go are also willing to work together.

Encourage your child to see the world wisely

Know they can do this.  Yes there are still moments when we clearly hold a wise space for our children but the days when adults are the “keepers of knowledge” have passed. It’s not about getting your child to adopt your point of view about how awful the world is.  This is about acceptance of what is and choosing better in each moment. Encourage them to make choices from a sense of courage and acceptance not from fear, anger or pride. Teach them how to recognize the difference.

Show them what it is to be calm. 

Weave in times in your family life where calm is the overall tone. Reinforce this sense in your child. Take breaks from technology and noise. Prepare and eat some meals in silence. This will benefit everyone because quiet and calm tells the body it’s safe. The more opportunities you and your child have for calm the greater the healing from the scary news talked about each day at school and found all over the internet.

Stop complaining about world problems. 

Complaining about our tainted food supply or the devastated salmon streams only provokes fear and anger. People mistakenly believe that because fear and anger were motivating to humans in the past they are effective and appropriate energies today. I don’t believe this is true. Years have passed and many well meaning people continue on with the same complaints now decades old.  Not much has changed and not much will if we continue to complain. I think we get the picture of how bad it is. Let the complainers continue doing this and you be different. Take the high road in full view of your child.  Fall in love with the life you have right now.  Let go of anything in the way of this. Adopt a reverence for life. Show your child what a reverence for life looks and feels like. Be grateful for the food you eat together. Take moments to feel blessed. Recycle out of love for your community and it’s wonderful well-meaning systems. Spend time outdoors in nature. Instead of complaining, remember what it feels like to love your planet and your life.

By letting it go it all gets done. The world is won by those who let it go.
— Lao Tzu

Help your child develop the tools of discernment

Just because it happened does not mean it’s true. When fighting breaks out in a country it is a reality on one level (human ego) it is not, however, the ultimate reality. Humans (especially the ones reading a blog like this) have access to higher ways of being and this must be mentored for our children. Therefore, we accept that people will continue to do despicable things to the planet, each other and themselves.  However, we can and must choose better. To encourage discernment help your child see that people are limited in their choices but that there’s always choice. Notice when they made a choice to show courage, kindness or compassion. When they chose negativity encourage them to let go.

I hope these ideas inspire you and your family.

Letting Go in Parenting   Sometimes let the child be your guide…Trust them with your time.  Trust them with your mind and trust them with your heart.

If you’re new to this site start here.

**As you read I invite you to pause and Let Go.**

Listen to the PODCAST of this! 

Ask yourself this question.

What really matters in childhood?

Here’s my sense.  Ideally, childhood is where we learn what it means to approve of ourself.  This sense of self-approval begins or doesn’t with the child-parent relationship. If, in reading this, you realize a sense of self-approval was not something you got as a child, I have great news.  The child inside you is still there!  You can create a sense of self-approval beginning now.

Let’s begin with a peek inside most everyone.

Regardless of our age, existing inside each of us is a child, an adult and a parent. The innocent, inner child lives mostly in the present. He’s delightfully curious and absorbs from his world without filters. Sometimes he gets into trouble. If this is not handled lovingly, overtime the child is wounded and may become a victim.

The parent is all-knowing, has expectations (typically of excellence) and takes on the job of scolding the child.  Parents often have disapproving energy.  To the child, they appear disappointed and at times disgusted.  Above all, the parent is always right.

The adult has a gentle yet wise energy. It’s the adult inside who acts calmly and without criticism often instead with humour.  They are accepting and approving. Unlike the parent, adults don’t yell unless there’s an emergency.

So there you have it, child, adult and parent in a nutshell.  Now we need a scenario from which to play.

Imagine you’ve planned to reduce the quantity of simple carbohydrates in your diet.  In plan english you’re cutting back on sugar, white flour, white rice and mashed potatoes.  Inside your fridge lives a gorgeous cupcake which includes two major no-no ingredients (plenty of sugar and white flour). As you stand in front of the fridge, door open, gazing longingly at the beguiling party-treat, answer this.  Who’s looking at the dreamy cupcake?

Peek-a-boo!  It’s the child.

If you want to see the child again flash into a scene at a family Thanksgiving where relatives of all ages hover around the feast. Who are all these people wearing flimsy, multicoloured cracker crowns, forks and knives poised at the ready? They’re children.  Pay attention next time you join others at a yummy meal and look for the child inside to come out – “Awh… I just need one more slice of this super deelish chocolate cake” (child).

Child says, “Blah, blah blah, what about that cupcake you mentioned?”  Right.  Back to the cupcake.

Children in proximity of treats are known for their speed. In a microsecond, that cupcake gets whizzed out of the fridge, no plate and before you could say “fuzzy pickles” a bite is swirling around the child’s mouth.  Oh, oh!  Who shows up next but the disapproving parent!  Hands on hips and from a super grumpy face they yell, “Really?”  “What’s that in your mouth?”  (Parents love rhetorical questions) “Don’t you know that cupcake is full of heart-attack inducing sugar and white flour?”  Parent goes on (and on) and eventually states the obvious (another favourite tactic).

“Does this mean everytime you see a cupcake you’re going to wolf it down without even asking my permission?!”

“Uh…huh.” child replies contemplating another bite.

And so it goes, the ancient and often draining drama of parent and child.

What happens when we seek the adult as replacement for the parent?

One more time with the cupcake scene.

The adult observes the child munching on the sugary treat and smiles (no expectations just acceptance).  Child smiles back and wipes icing from her mouth, “You want some?” she gestures at the ravaged cupcake still in hand.

“I’m good.” replies the adult.  Then child does something interesting.

“This is good too and I’ve had enough for now.”  Then child grabs a small tupperware container pops in the remaining piece of cupcake and returns this to the fridge.

What if every interaction with child involved the approving adult instead of the disapproving parent?  Check right now who’s answering this question (adult, parent or child)?

“Love is the only domain that expands intelligence.”

~ Humberto Maturana

To be continued… in the next post.

How can we use the Letting Go process with our possessions?

Let Go of your Clutter

Listen to the Podcast of this post here

Letting go of stuff is the same as letting go of pent up negative energy in your body.  It’s the glorious realization that you’d been holding on to something for no good reason.  Incidentally, the only good reason is love.  Do you love it?  Then keep it.  “Wait a minute” you say, “I don’t love my toilet but I’m not putting it on the curb anytime soon.”  “I need that thing and a pile of other stuff I don’t love.”

Let’s expand our view of love for a moment with the help of Dr Hawkins.  Love is actually a way of being in the world.  It really has nothing to do with attachments (to things or people).  Love in this sense is gratitude for the energy that serves you in your life and that includes your own energy.  It’s having a deep appreciation.  So don’t tell me your toilet is unappreciated or that you aren’t grateful to have one.  In this sense you might agree that you do love your toilet.  Now apply love as a way of being (grateful and appreciative) to other items around you.  Play with the letting go technique while you go through some of your possessions.  I’m certain you will discover some very interesting insights into the energy you associate with your stuff.

The Reduce Your Clutter movement has been gaining momentum over the years.  We’ve been encouraged to Simplify Our Life by living clutter-free.  As an intuitive, I sense another aspect to this picture. Reducing clutter is an indication of our increasing awareness of energy.  Clutter has a numbing effect not unlike excess body fat, consuming carbohydrates or alcohol.  As we let go our excess and unloved stuff, we release our energy draining attachments.  We become, “un-numb”.  Getting rid of cutter is a physical form of letting go.  Many people who clear out their homes often happily discover they have lost body weight as well.

“Are you should-ing all over yourself?”

Imagine a few items you possess for the simple reason that you “should keep it”.  Maybe one thing is a family heirloom, another was created by your daughter when she was only 4 years old and there’s that high school year book with a goofy note from your first love.  “I should keep all that stuff” you plead.  “It’s sentimental!”  First of all “should” always means guilt is involved.  So move into the big question, “Do I love it?”  “Does it evoke a sense of gratitude and appreciation?”  Or is it time to let it go? People who carry excess body weight are often full of unconscious guilt which is projected on their possessions in the form of, “I should keep this.”  Let go your stuff, let go your guilt and lose the excess body fat which acted as a cushion from all that negative energy you carried around. If you haven’t read The Potato Story on this website, visit the page entitled, Why Let Go? to learn more about why we even have all that negative energy in our cells.

Letting go of clutter takes courage.   Because courage comes from the heart, love is very much involved here.  So remember to use the question, Do I love it?” when you’re reducing clutter.

One more thing to consider.  After you’ve let go of your stuff physically and emotionally be sure to anchor the good feelings of lightness and freed up energy.  Take a few minutes to sit in silence.  Bask in the gratitude and appreciation for the things you do have around you.

If you’re new to this site Start Here to answer the question, “Why Let Go?”

Do you relate to this scenario.  You’re in a relationship and it doesn’t matter what kind (marriage, friendship, employee/employer, parent/adult child, neighbours, sisters) and you want to let it go and move on.  Perhaps it took you years to even admit this. So will you do it?  Will you let go and move on?  Easier said than done right?.  Why?

I absolutely love the world I live in, warts and all.  In fact, I’m not a fair-weather resident of my culture which I find fascinatingly crazy and adorable.  But when it comes to ending relationships I have to say our cultural response is totally nasty.  We hear things like, “You’ve made your bed…”  or “A friend is a friend till the end”  Never mind that after 25 years you have nothing left in common with your “friend till the end friend”.  How about this one, “Don’t burn your bridge”  as if our entire future relied on our past work performance.  Then we have the biblical demand to “honour thy father and mother” despite the fact that for some people this puts them square in the cross hairs of family violence and abuse.  Why is it so not acceptable to let go and move on from a relationship? For many of us years pass as we continue to put energy into relationships that are clearly over.

Why Can’t We Move On? 

Here’s what I’ve intuited around this very draining human behaviour of clinging to a dead relationship.  Deep inside of us is an unconscious but powerful fear of abandonment.  And this fear is running the show!  Until we let go, we will always choose to drag out inappropriate or abusive relationships.  We will continue to place ourselves in horrendous conditions to avoid potential aloneness.  We sheepishly say, “It’s better to hang with the devil you know than the devil you don’t”.  Or something like that.

Our cultural response to the ending of a relationship is so abusive people will actually stay in an abusive relationship in order to avoid being further abused by their culture.  By culture, I refer to friends, family, community members, social networking and of course the media.

According to Dr David R Hawkins, relationships work when there is “alignment”.  I have a wonderful artist friend who loves to create Venn diagrams.  Alignment can be shown with a Venn diagram.   I don’t want this to become a math lesson but you have circle A intersecting with Circle B and the red in the middle is the alignment.

When I think of alignment in a relationship I remember what I’ve learned from Dr Mario Martinez (Mind Body Code).  He teaches never to compromise in a relationship which was shocking to me at first and because compromise is so expected in our culture.  He suggests we be who we are without compromise and in our relationships look for common ground.  To me this means alignment!  So if your boyfriend likes car racing (and you don’t) and you like mountain biking (and he doesn’t) you find something you both enjoy like dressing up and going out for dinner.  Healthy relationships intersect in the alignment.

How Do We Know When it’s Time to Move On?

When a relationship falls out of alignment (imagine two circles floating apart) it will either re-align or it won’t.  If it doesn’t then it’s time to let go and move on.  We all know the agony created inside people who stay in a relationship that is clearly out of alignment.  This is where the letting go technique can be of great service.

Try this.

Imagine and hold in mind, a relationship that is out of alignment.  If you are in one presently this is the best place to do some letting go.  If you’re using your memory to recall a past relationship we can do some wonderful healing on pent up emotions around abandonment and humiliation.  Hanging on to a disconnection can also generate a heap of guilt.  We’ll release that too!

If you’ve not learned the letting go technique we’ll review it right now.  Feel that negative emotion around the relationship you are holding in mind.  Find the sensations in your body and quiet your mind.  Thoughts are not helpful.  Breathe into the sensations that come up in your body and allow them to live in your body.  Give them breath.  Pay no attention to anything other than the sensations in and around your body.  You don’t need to think about anything because you have an intention to breathe into your emotional sensations.  Do this until there’s a noticeable lightening in your body.  Sometime you will take a big breath and feel lighter or tension will release from your face and jaw.  You may even sense a tiny smile forming at the corners of your mouth.

Practice letting go on the sticky residue from a really old relationship, long ago ended.  You will know you have successfully let go of the pent up negativity from this relationship when all the emotion you can find connected with it feels gentle and benign.  If someone asked you about that relationship your response (which in the past may have been quite animated and charged) will be one of benign indifference.  Well done!

In many letting go sessions I’ve minded for old cobweb covered relationships from my past.  Until these are let go of, they consume a surprisingly large amount of energy.

Let’s be part of a newly evolving aspect of our culture.  The part where we affirm alignment in relationships and when someone (including us) says it’s over we are generously accepting of this.  When it’s over it’s over. No wallowing or fanfare.  Maybe some gratitude and then move on.

Remember the most important relationship with which you need alignment is the one you have with yourself.  This is a key benefit of letting go.

Let go and align more with your authentic self.

If this is your first visit to the site, Start Here to learn about Letting Go.

“The ego is humourless.”

~ Dr David R Hawkins

Yesterday I had an interesting discussion that could have easily turned into an argument.  It was with a lovely and talented person who is very vested in a certain self-improvement practice.  In our discussion I suggested desire is a negative emotion and to have true freedom we need to let it go.  Then I listened as she tried to convince me I was misinformed.  The energy of her “education” had a very distinct quality.  Actually it was what was lacking that caught my attention.  Humour.  It was absent of lightness and breath.  There was no smile in her voice as I listened over the phone.  Eventually the energy shifted as she dove into a light hearted story.  “Whew!”  I remember thinking, ” That was heavy.”  Incidentally, “heavy” is a hallmark of the ego.  When you can’t find any humour in the topic and the energy feels heavy this is another example of pride.  Watch for it, because it’s very common.  If you notice this heaviness on the news (and really, why are you watching the news if you’re letting go?!)  use it as a trigger and find the energy in your body.  Let go.

If you’ve been suffering from some dark thinking and you can’t seem to quiet your mind,  and let go, watch a comedy.  I really enjoy some of the old comedies like, I Love Lucy, Carol Burnett and Pink Panther.  The comedian Jim Gaffigan on Netflix or YouTube is brilliant for dissolving the righteous anger of the ego.  Speaking of anger, avoid angry comedians as their energy tends to have an anchoring of pride effect instead of dissolving it.

When was the last time you had a huge belly laugh or laughed until your eyes watered and your tummy hurt?  These experiences are powerfully healing.  Often joy lives right underneath a sticky, negative emotion.  Let that go and voila, instant funny-bone!  

Another way to your inner funny-bone is by being difficult to offend.  People who are always offended are often disconnected from their sense of humour.  They aren’t usually funny either.  St Francis of Assisi suggested we go through life as if we were “wearing a loose garment”.  This way, life is not constricting or suffocating.  When you don’t offend easily you are open to the present moment and this is often where humans are delightfully funny.  Imagine yourself at a comedy show where your favourite comedian is on stage performing.  If you disappear into your thoughts during the show you will miss out on the fun.  So humour is another powerful way to live (and laugh) in the present moment.

Q: How much “ego” do you need?
A: Just enough so that you don’t step in front of a bus.
~  Shunryu Suzuki

I love the humour provoked by silly questions.  Just for fun and for letting go what might be in the way of your funny bone, ask yourself these giggle inducing questions.  As the energy lightens, breathe into what comes up in your body.  Then move on to the next question.  This can be a really delightful experience if you let go any resistance you have to experiencing the playfulness of these questions.  Here goes:

When cheese gets its picture taken – what does it say?

Why is abbreviation such a long word?

How did a fool and his money ever get together?

Why do they report power outages on tv?

Would a fly without wings be called a walk?

Do radioactive cats have 18 half lives?

Why are cigarettes sold in gas stations?

How do you know when it’s time to tune your bagpipes?

Is it true that cannibals don’t eat clowns because they taste funny?

Are you allowed to buy anything specific at a General Store?

Whatever happened to B batteries?

When a cow laughs does milk come out it’s nose?

🙂   

If you’re new to this site Start Here to answer the question, “Why Let Go?”

See if you can relate to this:

“About that, I’m right damn it! Don’t question me. I know what I know is true and I wouldn’t be standing here if it weren’t for the fact that I’m right.”

Let’s for a moment sink into how that felt. Read the quote above over again and find the sensations in your body. If you want to make it even more real pick something from your life that fits with the words.

It doesn’t matter who or what we connect to this, we can all relate to feeling this way. This is the feeling of pride.

Now let me ask you this question.

“Would you rather be happy or right?”

I love this powerful question! When I ask it of myself the letting go is often instantaneous. Of course I want to be happy! Why then is being pridefully right so difficult to let go? Let’s explore the emotion of pride and our cultural expressions around it.

Pride is a a tricky shape-shifter masquerading as goodness and beauty.  It can feel pretty good too in contrast to other feelings like guilt and apathy. With pride we sense an increase in power and mistakenly think we’ve arrived at a better place. It can feel so invigorating to be right.  Yet in using pride we disconnect ourselves from noticing the overall negative and draining effects it has on our mind body spirit. We fool ourselves into believing that our righteousness protects us. So we cling to our opinions about everything. We become indignant about so many things. We blame and point fingers at “the enemy” and it feels so right.

“Pride is said to be the last vice a good man gets clear of.”  

~ Benjamin Franklin

I want to create some further awareness of pride but before I do, I need to share a distinction.

Pride has two sides to it. There is the positive uplifting aspects of pride. Pride in one’s accomplishments not taken too far and connected to gratitude can be very positive. A sense of pride in one’s country, ethnicity and even sexual orientation can be heart-warming and paradoxically inclusive of other countries, cultures and diversities. These forms of pride are healthy and there are many others. One of the difficulties to recognizing the negative forms of pride is that our post-modern culture encourages and rewards it. I felt it might be helpful to present some examples of how the draining form of pride appears in our daily life.

Do-Gooderism ~ which is actually a need to have power and control over others.

Do-Gooderism sounds like this: “I know what’s best for you better than you do yourself”. It’s helping when you’ve not been asked. This is emotional escapism in the form of pride. If you are a do-gooder always “helping” others, ask yourself, “what am I not willing to face inside myself?”. “What am I escaping from that I don’t want to deal with?”  Often it’s suppressed guilt. Someone who has let go of all their suppressed and repressed guilt stops going around “fixing” others. Helping others can be a beautiful and rewarding human experience. Be sure to create awareness and to honestly check the intention behind the helping.

Glamour ~ fixating on the external presentation of the body and the ego. Vanity.

It is the drama queen, the reality TV show, ego against ego. Glamour says, “I’m more beautiful, more interesting, more intelligent, more cunning, more creative, more spiritual, more informed than you or anyone else”. In short, “I am more”.

Beauty is uplifting, universal and comes from Grace by contrast the effects of glamour are deflating, disconnecting and stem from pride.

One form of glamour is found in the over adorning and embellishing of the body. I’m sorry to say that could mean your tattoos and piercings. With most everything it’s not the event or product of the event but the intention behind it that tells you if it has a negative or positive effect on you or others. Let’s use tattoos as an example. From my childhood, I recall seeing those dark blue anchors typically on the arms of older men. When I inquired, the response always had a resonance of honour at being connected to others from that time in the sailor’s life. I remember sensing the “fondness” to something around those tattoos. The same feeling arose for me when a teenage friend responded to my inquiry of his tattoo. He shared it was his family symbol from Japan.  A small and simple but beautiful red flower enclosed in a circle. The intention behind this tattoo felt beautiful.  He was honouring his family. Often a person will use tattoo as a form of expressing who they are and a story goes along with each tattoo. Clues to the energy behind the tattoo can be found in the story and of course the choice of image. If you discover your tattoo came from less than honourable intentions you can let go on the feelings it provokes. Maybe you’ll have it removed or the letting go healing will trigger a new and loving story.

Glamour is also found in new ageism.   The sensationalism of psychics, mediums, and connecting with spirits and angels as a form of entertainment.

             On a personal note, real spiritual work  is rarely peaceful (to begin with).  It can be hair-raising, debilitating and down right chaotic at times.  I remember declaring my life’s intention was to be unconditionally loving to everyone and including myself.  Next thing I knew the most unloveable qualities in me came pouring out!  All manner of unappealing individuals came out of the wood work, zombie style demanding my attention and making my life a living crazy hell.  For what felt like forever I heaved through this.  Only recently have I felt light enough to tap into my authenticity and to share some of my journey with others.  So my message to you is – Don’t give up!  It gets better.  

Another example of pride manifesting as glamour is found in the compulsive behaviours of over exercising and radical diets. To enjoy one’s body and lovingly care for it is one of the gifts of being human. Over-developing the body, however, with the intention to put it on display otherwise known as “posing” is an obvious form of pride. If you are a poser ask yourself, “what is this really about for me?” and practice letting go of the emotions that arise. If you’ve taken the joy out of eating by following a hyper controlled diet or diet based on your version of how messed up the world is, look deeply at how this makes you feel. Do you feel happy eating that way or right?”.

Having a “Holier Than Thou” Attitude ~ exclusivity through radical religionist views.

This is an elitist stance and stems from the unconscious fear of not knowing. It is also a desire to be special and set apart typically on a pedestal. “Holier Than Thou” pride sounds like this: “We will show you the way for we hold the secrets that have been kept from you and for which you have been searching.” (presumably outside yourself). Cults are an example of this form of pride. Beware anyone who says there are secret levels and truth costs money. Followers are led to believe that truth is something you “get” outside of yourself typically from some lauded guru sitting on some throne and holding a special magic key to the information you need to be happy.  The great mystics and teachers all encouraged us to seek inner truth. Socrates said, “Know Thyself” Shakespeare wrote, “To thine own self be true” while the Buddha encouraged us to, “let go all attachments” and Jesus Christ taught that, “The Kingdom of Heaven is Within”. If you catch yourself, chequebook in hand, about to enter the “secret realm” please stop, go back to your car and let go. And let go all the way home.

To distinguish in yourself between healthy and draining forms of pride here’s a suggestion. Create awareness by tuning into the feelings connected to the thoughts and behaviour. Negative pride has signature feelings. It starts with that righteous energy where you are literally puffed up. Watch how you shift from being angry to being right which incidentally feels more powerful.  It feels like expansion as if you were wildly falling in love with the idea. However, this is the nasty trick of pride.

As I feel this energy rising in me, I interrupt it, silence the mind and use it as a trigger to let go.

Let’s conclude our time together by letting go with some lovely silence and going into our body with life giving breath.

If you’re new to this site Start Here to answer the question, “Why Let Go?”

Our world is full of ideas and practices to help you get what you want.  Many of these methods don’t work.  Some have benefits but contain flaws or traps. How can letting go help?

Do you relate to a fear of success?  It may surprise you to learn that fear of success is not actually a fear.  It’s a desire.  The desire to become someone else.  It’s often found in “career students”. Instead of actually living your dreams or the new and improved self, you take another course or read another book (visit another website…hmmm). Followers of the idea of Law of Attraction can find themselves in a similar rut. Years pass and the vision remains glued on the board…unmanifest. So what’s going on?

It’s true that, “What you hold in mind tends to manifest” (David R Hawkins). However, the key phrase is, “tends to”. Within your desire is the possibility but there are no guarantees of actuality*. Therefore, if you take another course you may finally let go wanting to be more and effortlessly flow into your new career or you may not. Practicing the Law of Attraction can build awareness of self and reveal inner clarity but it can also be a trap. Here’s why.

Law of Attraction encourages the individual to connect powerful thoughts with richly felt emotion in order to manifest anything.  If you’re practicing letting go you already know that thoughts can really get in the way.  What’s more important is that the key emotion in law of attraction is desire.  Yet desire is a negative emotion. Oh sure, the wanting can feel quite exhilarating. But as many desire fed addictions (gambling, sex, substances, success, ways of thinking) have shown us, the overall effect, over time, is draining. If you hold your desire in mind and “feel the having” as encouraged with Law of Attraction it will show up as wanting (desire).  In doing this, you make a declaration of, “I don’t have”.  This results in prolonging the not having.  Practicing Law of Attraction may eventually get you what you want (often through eventual surrender) but the emotion of desire can render it ineffective. So how then do we manifest?

Dr Hawkins taught an elegant method for manifesting using Letting Go as the key practice. Here’s my version of how it works:

First create your vision – what you want (to be, have or do) and make this as creatively visual and emotionally attractive as you wish.
This is your intention. Then all you need to do is manage the negative emotion of desire connected to this intention. Whenever you feel the wanting of your intention, let go the feelings of wanting. If you catch yourself day dreaming about that new job, stop. Quiet the mind and go into the feelings and breathe as you would with any letting go experience. If you would like to revisit your intention occassionally there’s no harm in this. Let go on the feelings of desire.  Let go the sensations of craving or anything else that comes up during your letting go.

This method can be applied with wonderful results to any intention such as:

weight-loss

more money

better job

new home

relationships

travel plans

a cup of coffee or anything else under the sun!

The true Secret to getting what you want is to actually let go the emotion of wanting it.   Letting go reveals a life of open hearted, acceptance which gives a sense of completeness to each moment.  In other words, what more could you want?

*Spiritual note:  Occasionally, you may hit a karmatic wall and discover for whatever reason it’s not in the cards for you to be that or have that or go there.  Can you let go the not having and trust this is for your best?

If you’re new to this site Start Here to answer the question, “Why Let Go?”

Letting Go of Shame and Humiliation

In our world, there is nothing worse than being humiliated. In fact, it’s even shameful to talk about humiliation of any kind. Recently this has begun to change. Some very courageous people are stepping up and launching our collective healing around this most debilitating, negative emotion.

Last year, shame researcher, Brene Brown’s TED talk went viral as an indication that our culture is finally realizing the devastating effect of shame. In her TED talk, Dr Brown shared, to avoid experiencing shame, we’ll do just about anything. Most commonly we take action to numb ourselves. We overeat, over medicate, watch excessive amounts of television, become a “holic”. Workaholic, shopaholic, alcoholic, chocoholic, sexaholic, sugarholic, cleanaholic, blogaholic – Yikes!

Clearly, we live in a culture of avoidance.

Let’s look at what people will do to avoid being humiliated. Remember Martha Stewart and her insider trading choices? All Martha needed to do was tell the truth. Admit her very human actions. Instead, we all know what happened next. She lied and went to jail for it. In a sense, Martha took the heat for many people’s shame-inducing lies. It’s important to consider that what she did was understandably human. We can all relate to her choices even if we don’t want to admit we would have done the same thing.

At the core of this avoidance of shame and humiliation is a deep misunderstanding. Our culture believes humiliation is a sister to humility. Nothing could be further from the truth.

Humility requires a strong sense of self-worth and compassion. A truly humble person is not a victim to the effects of the world. They accept the ups and downs of life. This includes an honest acceptance of themselves, warts and all. Humility says, “I did what I believed to be right at the time, knowing what I knew then.”

Martha avoided humility, seeing it as a threat.  A guarantee to humiliation. How did this work for her?  It didn’t.  Martha went to jail where she likely experienced the humility that was inaccessible at the time of the trading scandal.

Humility

“Perpetual quietness of heart. It is to have no trouble. It is never to be fretted or vexed, irritable or sore; to wonder at nothing that is done to me, to feel nothing done against me.

“It is to be at rest when nobody praises me, and when I am blamed or despised, it is to have a blessed home in myself where I can go in and shut the door and pray to my Creator in secret and be at peace, as in a deep sea of calmness, when all around and about is seeming trouble. ”

~ Anon

Let Go Humiliation and Feel Joy!

Dr Brene Brown suggested that our addiction to numbing shame contributes to our unconscious numbing of joy. When we suppress the negative she theorized, we unknowingly suppress the positive. Dr Mario Maritnez, who authored the audio course, The Mind Body Code, presents information that agrees with Dr Brown. He encourages us to use a form of mind / body, letting go which takes us beyond the limited mental-focused healing practices into the body where true healing occurs. His work reminds us we are not just a mind therefore the healing needs to include the body. Of course, I believe this is exactly why the letting go process works!

Dr Martinez suggests a shaming wound also has an antidote emotion or state. To heal shame we need honour.

I’ve worked personally with the antidote of honour. For example after I’ve done the letting go process for sensations of humiliation or shame I then allow myself to experience the emotions of honour. After many letting go sessions, I have shifted my antidote for shame from honour to adoration. What I mean by this is, I allow myself to feel adored and to remember experiences when I felt adored and when I adored myself. Honour felt a little too official and frankly too masculine for me. I relate better to adoration, my personal antidote for shame.

Let’s conclude by taking this moment from the mind to the body. Allow yourself to do the letting go method on a story of humiliation or feelings of being ashamed. Then allow the experience of honour and adoration to fill your body, mind and spirit.

If you’re new to this site Start Here to answer the question, “Why Let Go?”  or Listen to the Podcast.

Listen to the podcast of the material on this page instead!

Sometimes there is no preparation possible with letting go and one gets right to the silencing of the mind and breathing into and welcoming the sensations noticed in the body. However, if you are creating a letting go practice, I have some suggestions.

Dr Mario Martinez, creator of the audio program, The Mind Body Code, shares some wonderful research and techniques on relaxing the mind and body. He suggests ideally we need to create a physical sense of safety by first protecting the back. Maybe by sitting comfortably against a wall or in a high back chair. Another suggestion is to not, try to relax. Asking the body to relax only seems to create tension. Instead to gently breathe into the body and to create what Dr Martinez says is a Mona Lisa smile. This is a physical indicator to the mind that says, I am safe.

The mind body expert, Dawson Church, suggests the brain goes into relaxed, receptivity when we physically drop our tongue – just let it drop in our mouth. He also recommends with closed eyes, we visualize a field of black, behind our eyes. This visual is said to instantly shift our brain waves telling the body it’s safe and inducing relaxation and calm.

Dr David R Hawkins, the inspiration behind learn-letting-go.com, encourages us to remember we are free to let go or not. Nobody is being forced to let go. It is a choice.

We are merely utilizing our own inner nature to get freer and happier.  ~ Dr David R Hawkins

The most common times I would use these ideas to help me prepare is during my planned practice. Typically, when I am waking in the morning and as I’m drifting off to sleep. I am at these times quite relaxed and comfortable. I will silently ask if there is anything I need to let go of and then tune into my body, cease all thinking and breath into the areas of my body I notice. Maybe there’s a crick in my neck, I breathe into it until I no longer feel it. Then I keep going, breathing and noticing the sensations then breathing into these. The overall effect is wonderful and I will either drift off to sleep at night or if it’s morning, I rise feeling quite full of energy.

Often after letting go, I naturally feel a deep sense of gratitude for the simple practice.

To begin an answer to the question “Why Let Go?” here’s a story.  Listen to Doree tell the story.

The Potato Story

When a child is born we give them a magical burlap sack, a potato sack.  The child is encouraged by their family, friends and those around them to carry this sack everywhere.  Then the child learns when life gets hard or something bad happens we use a potato to remember it and place it in our potato sack.  Every time we’re disappointed in ourselves or others we get a new potato.  Each morning upon waking we pick up the sack of potatoes and take it with us wherever we go.  Imagine that sack of potatoes over time. It gets heavy.  Somedays it feels so heavy we don’t think it’s possible for us to carry.  So we drag it.  Old potatoes inside shoot out eyes and roots in a tangled mess.  They shrivel and rot.  It’s not long before our heavy sack of potatoes begins to stink.  Somedays the smell is unbearable.  We have get-togethers with others and bring our potatoes.   At these times we dig into our stinky sacks and take out potatoes to talk about.  We listen to sad and scary potato stories.  Then we put everything back and drag it home.  Some nights before bed we dig through the pile and remember many old potatoes.  It can be a form of awful entertainment.  Occasionally we wonder about leaving a potato. Then we change our mind and put it back.  Life gets heavy and some days it really stinks.

Then one day it occurs to us that we could let some of this burden go.  We could dig a hole and bury a potato or leave a few by the side of a road.  Once let go they naturally compost.  With less potatoes we have more energy.   The air is fresher and we discover ourselves breathing deeply maybe for the first time ever.   A small few of us have left their entire sacks behind.  They smile and shake their heads at any potato and move through life feeling very light-weight.  Potato-less.  Sometimes they teach others how to let go of their potatoes.  Are you ready and willing to let go of your potatoes?

Click here to learn how.